Forgive me
From CaseyPedia
[edit] Casey's "Forgive Me" letter to Galina
Upon the second closing of IAFF, Casey Serin briefly posted this message to his wife Galina, only to take it down shortly after:
In Closing… a Message to My Wife My Dearest G,
I know it’s painful for your to read anything from me and my words have lost all meaning. And as much as I hate, HATE, what Mark V. and Duane L. have done and are still doing with their bully tactics and pointless threats and severe interferences in my life and our marriage…
I have to take a step back and accept that it was I who originally brought all of this upon ourselves - financial ruin, toxic publicity, serious marriage problems.
I’m truly deeply sorry… for all the crap I put your through in the last 3 some years of marriage. I have broken your spirit in a lot of ways and I have left you for MY business and MY financial goals. I disregarded your opinions, personality and desires. I have been a terrible husband.
Back when we got engaged, I remember reflecting upon my calling as a husband according to the bible (Ephesians 5:25-33):
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.
In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body.
“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
I have always thought this was a very high calling but I felt ready for it. I never realized how hard it was going to be:
To be a leader worthy of respect…
To love you AS MYSELF…
To GIVE UP MY LIFE for you…
I failed miserably!
Having said that… I have NO regrets of getting married to you and getting married at a “young age” (according to our corrupt society). You are the only girlfriend I have ever had. The only woman I have ever loved. You are the PERFECT person for me.
I just wish I would not have been so blind….
When you brought to light on the internet your old wounds in vivid detail and the ways I have mistreated you, I must say I had a mixture of feelings. First, I hated the “delivery system” and second I hated the fact that all our marriage issues are going on the internet for everybody to see, when I thought it should be dealt in private between you me and a counselor.
But then I realized that you DO deserve to have your story told. And who am I to say how you will tell it. And after seeing all that pain and hurt in those words, and your COMPLETELY new attitude towards me after I came back from Australia… it all has been an awaking experience for me.
The consequences are huge. I realize I may lose you. I really REALLY hope I don’t. But at this point the only thing I can do is to take responsibility for all this and begin working on myself and most importantly crying out to God that he will change me and give me the strength be the kind of husband you deserve.
I want to ask you…
Please forgive me for everything.
And I know, my words are empty because of all the broken promises and disrespect in the past. If I tell you that no amount of money and fame is going to be worth losing you, you still wont believe me, and I am the one to blame for that.
So I must start taking action. And NOT do it HALF-WAY like I have been - by taking my time with shutting down the blog and contemplating about how I should use the money from the domain sale. Half-hearted auction may be just as bad as no-action.
Thus, I am shutting the blog down RIGHT NOW with this closing post. That’s just one of a million steps in the long road ahead. I will leave this post up for a couple of days and then this blog is going to disappear for good. Forever this time.
Missing you…
Casey Serin
[edit] Casey's Postscript
A postscript was later added to the blog entry that read:
P.S. I know you and other may see this as my usual “spin” or pressure or manipulation. Well, for what it’s worth - it is NOT. Rather a closing message from the heart. The underlying theme of this entire “foreclosure” story has really been my relationship with you. That’s why I want to end on this note. Thank you for your understanding and thank you for your companionship, wonderful moments and beautiful memories. I hope for a brighter future.
